One year ago

One year ago tonight, we lost a friend. Ivan was killed, I'm still not sure how or why.
I don't understand why someone like Ivan had to die. He was only 38, he had so much life to look forward to. I totally took for granted that we would attend each others children's weddings - that we would be friends until we were old.
There are so many other people who deserve to die, why him?
Last year we had such good times together - memories that I will never forget. Ivan showed us Cape Town and he showed us, by example, how to live. How to be spontaneous. How to laugh! How to accept people.
I miss him, I miss our friendship because, even though his wife and girls remain, it's not the same. Something is missing. He is.